May 30, 2025
I’m not saying skills and knowledge are overrated, but something else matters just as much. You can have an amazing resume, a degree from an elite university, and a head full of industry expertise and lose out to someone less qualified who simply got themselves in the right room.
Getting yourself in the room really matters, and it can make up for deficiencies you may have in your game. I find this especially true for people just breaking into an industry and lack industry-specific knowledge.
Getting in the room is a skill, not just luck. Do some people end up there through nepotism or luck? Yeah. But not everyone, and the ones who hone the skill of getting in the right rooms get rewarded handsomely for their efforts.
Limiting beliefs
Before we get into how you can sharpen your door opening skills, we should identify some limitations keeping people from putting themselves in the right positions.
Most people believe they need to develop skills before they will succeed AND they will get rewarded once they develop their skills. Neither are true, necessarily. Think about it. We’ve spent the last few decades people telling people they need a college degree if they will succeed at all, and got them to believe they would end up with a good paying job and career if they finished a four year degree.
Student debt increased 500% from 2004-2023. Earnings certainly haven’t kept up, and Americans now have about $1.6 Trillion in student loans (more than double the amount in 2008). The now-graduating college class of 2025 will get an average salary under $67k/year. Engineering and computer science majors will earn more, business and social science majors will earn less.
Costs are outpacing the reward of front-loading knowledge in college.
But other industries work differently. Out of high school, an apprentice electrician in the US averages $60k/year. In four years they can move up to journeyman electrician and make $70k. They earn $240k in four years while an average college student leaves school with $30k-$50k in debt. Someone choosing a trade earns while they learn.
This isn’t a diatribe to steer people away from college, because the average college graduate does earn 50% more than a high school graduate. It’s to illuminate the advantage of starting sooner, and you can execute the same strategy in the business world. Don’t think you need to know everything to get in the room. Get in the room and learn from the smart people sitting around the table.
I’ve seen people with half the experience get ahead just because they showed up, smiled, asked questions, and stayed curious.
It starts with believing you belong. Part of that mindset involves accepting where you are.
If you have a hard time with that because you’re at the beginning of your career, use this strategy: Tell people you’re just starting out. Many people (not all, but many) will want to teach you and get a dopamine hit from it. Use them to meet the people you need to meet, and show them gratitude for their help.
Open doors
Those people, the ones who get ahead by being in the room have the skill to see opportunities. Sometimes it’s easy and the door to the room’s wide open. Walk through those. Don’t hesitate. What does that look like?
Show up to networking events. Accept invitations to lunches, dinners, happy hours, or other gatherings, especially if you’re the most junior person there and feel out of place. Make it your place. Volunteer to work on projects with senior-level people.
Ask good questions, give value, don’t take credit, and be likeable.
Closed doors
Other doors are closed, but they’re not locked. Try the handle and be friendly. Ask for an invitation, connection, or introduction. Reach out cold to people who inspire you, but for all that’s holy, put effort into your outreach. Apply for jobs you may not feel 100% ready for.
The famous Hewlett-Packard internal report discussing gender gaps in applications showed men applied for jobs when they meet 52% of the requirements. Women applied when they met 56%, which doesn’t seem like a significant gap, but the difference is highest for the most junior roles. The compounding effect on a career gets big pretty quick.
Be bold. Turn the handle. Get in the room.
Locked doors
Some doors are locked. Kick them down.
If you see a friend or colleague setting up a meeting or event, offer to help them to do the grunt work. Show up early to set up and offer to stay late to clean up. It’s the smart way to crash a party.
Inquire about valuable tasks that people find it difficult to make time for. Do them, make them high quality and invaluable. Don’t expect kudos. In fact, you can even let someone else take the credit. Just ask for feedback and they will keep asking you to come back.
Pitch a new role at your company for a position of need. Make sure you demonstrate the role will have high ROI with believable data.
What’s behind the curtain?
Getting in the door matters so much. Don’t waste your time once you get there. Find a mentor who you admire. Employees who participate in mentoring programs get promoted five times more often than those who aren’t. They also get retained 33% more often than those who don’t have a mentor.
Build your network. 70% of jobs never get posted publicly. Those jobs get filled through referrals. Plus, the posted jobs tend to get filled by referral, too. Getting a job from randomly applying is like winning the lottery. That’s a slight exaggeration. Cold applications have a 7% success rate. Good luck.
Pay attention when you get there. The knowledge you gain with proximity doesn’t get taught in school. You will learn the actual tactics the top talent in your company and industry use to get ahead. 85% of a typical organization’s knowledge base comes from tacit knowledge, not academic pursuits. Soak that up from the people around you.
Get your booty in the room.
People are obsessed with building skills, knowledge, resources, and being prepared to excel. Those are important. But if you’re not sure what to do, or you feel underqualified for a role you want, get your booty in the room and figure the rest out later.
One last message for leaders: you may not realize you’re a gate keeper. Think about ways you can keep the door cracked for someone to slip in because your trivial meeting could mean the world to someone else. It’ll also help you find good (and ambitious) talent faster.